Chapter 1
Lexi
I hate hospitals.
That's what I'm thinking right now, as I stand in a waiting room at a military facility in Germany. I'm pacing and my sister-in-law, Becky, is sitting down, back ramrod straight, staring blankly at the wall.
We were at a family dinner with my parents when Becky got the call.
My brother is a Marine, and while he's been deployed, Becky comes over each week for family dinner. My parents insist on dinner every Sunday no matter what. Becky says it's been a great distraction during deployments.
Well, thank God we were there, when she got the call. She was told my brother had been hurt, but he was alive. They said it's serious and were taking him to a military hospital in Germany.
When she was so stunned that she wasn't able to speak, I had to take over the phone call and get all the details. The moment we hung up the phone, the house erupted in a flurry of activity.
There was no way we were letting her go alone. Since my dad just had back surgery a few weeks ago, he couldn't go, and my mom needed to stay to take care of him, so that left me. Just like that, we were packing our bags, more like I was packing both our bags, because Becky wasn't able to focus.
Becky may be my brother's wife, but she has been my best friend, since grade school. So, even if it wasn't my brother who was hurt, I'd still be right by her side.
My parents made me promise I'd call them the moment we landed, and again, after we talked to the doctors. My mom wants photos and video proof he's okay.
That was Sunday.
We took several connecting flights out of Savannah, Georgia to get on our flight to Germany. Neither of us slept. I don't think anyone on the plane could tell anything was wrong. If they did, they didn’t say anything. We defaulted to our old selves, connected to the plane's Wi-Fi, turned on beauty tutorials on YouTube, and spent half the flight saying things like 'Why did they think that was a good idea?' and 'What did she do to her hair?'
But when they announced we were landing in Germany, we both became somber, feeling again like a bucket of cold water was poured over us. We landed, made it through customs, got to our hotel, and then checked in. That was what would have been Monday night back home. I think it's early morning Tuesday here though, but honestly, I'm not completely sure.
After dumping our stuff in our room, we headed right to the hospital. I'm not kidding less than sixty seconds in the room. That brings us to here. Now, we’re waiting to be escorted in to see Johnny.
From what we have been told, his unit was on patrol and was hit by an IED. We don't know any details other than he was alive, when he was transferred here. So, now we wait.
A nurse comes out about fifteen minutes later and leads us back through several sets of doors, and finally, to a large half circle room. The nurse’s station is in the center, and there are about twelve beds arranged in a horseshoe around the nurse’s station so the nurses can see every patient from their desk. From what the nurse says, this is the ICU room, but family is allowed here.
She leads us to Johnny's bed, and although he looks pretty beat up, he’s fairly alert. He’s in good spirits, but that's always been Johnny, happy-go-lucky. When he sees Becky, his face lights up. With tears in her eyes, she hugs him carefully.
Then, the nurse starts talking to us, like Johnny isn't even right in front of us.
"He has some burns and bruises, and we had to amputate part of his leg just below the knee, but he will be a good candidate for a prosthetic. There were some internal injuries, too. He will need significant recovery time and physical therapy, too. We’re watching him now for infection, and as soon as he's in the clear, he can go back stateside. If you need anything or have any questions, check with us at the desk. The doctor will be by later."
I thank her and hang back, letting them have their moment, but I overhear the nurse talking about the guy in the bed next to Johnny. Apparently, he's been severely burned on the right side of his body, has a high risk of infection, and they don't know, if he will make it. He's been in and out of consciousness. When they say his name, my heart sinks.
Noah Carr.
I've seen Noah and his fiancée, Whitney, around different events and deployment homecomings. I'm not a fan of his fiancé, but Noah has always seemed like a great guy, not that I ever talked to him in person.
Then, it all seems to hit me, and my eyes water. I refuse to think of that day. The day I got a very different visit. I say a prayer for the man in the next bed and hope he knows how lucky he is to be alive.
Instead, I try to focus on Johnny, and when his eyes meet mine, it's like he knows what I'm thinking. Holding his arms out to me, he wraps me in a hug.
"I'm not going anywhere, Lex. I promise you that." He whispers in my ear.
We sit with Johnny, and he asks us to talk about back home or anything, really. Becky tells him about family dinners, what is going on at work, and our dad's back surgery. It’s all stuff I’ve heard over the last few weeks, and after a while, I zone out a bit and take a look around me.
When a woman enters the room, following a nurse, she captures my attention. She’s all dolled up in a dress and heels, her makeup perfectly done, and not a hair out of place. Her shoes and bag all match her outfit in stark comparison to other family members, who like Becky and I, look like we just got off the plane and came straight here.
When she moves her hair from her face, I recognize her. It's Whitney, Noah's fiancée. Though, Noah appears to be awake, he’s not talking. Looking at her, I don't hear what she’s saying at first, but it’s apparent that she’s angry. I try not to eavesdrop, but as her voice gets louder, it's hard not, too.
Then, I hear what’s she saying, and my heart sinks, but then, I'm furious.
"How the hell am I supposed to explain you to people? Burns all over your face, and you’ll ruin our wedding photos. How could I possibly marry you now? We could never have kids, because they'd be terrified of you, and they’d think you're a monster. We'd never be able to go out in public. What were you thinking going anywhere near that fire?"
When Noah turns his head away and locks eyes with me for the first time, we really see each other, and my heart stops. His eyes are sapphire blue, and I feel the air around us start to sizzle. I've never felt this jolt from someone just looking at me. When my heart starts up again, it's racing in overtime.
I look over at Johnny, who is their Unit Leader, and I can see he’s pissed. I've only ever seen Johnny this angry once before in my life, and it ended very, very badly.
"We are done. There’s no way I can marry you now," she says in a final blow and turns to walk out of the room.
Before I can even think, I'm right behind her, and she doesn’t make it out of the door, when I’m in her face. One of the nurses is on the phone and watching us, like a hawk, and hopefully, calling security.
"You’re a real piece of shit," I tell her. She looks like she’s been slapped, but before she can speak, I go on. "If you didn't love him, why even come here? Why make the effort? He's fighting for his life, and that's how you talk to him? You’re the monster not him. You know what? This is the best thing that could have happened to him, as it will weed people like you out of his life."
"You know nothing," she snarls and tries to move around me.
I block her path and give a sarcastic laugh, "I know you’re lucky enough for him to live and make it home. Not everyone does." I say, walking away, as security meets her in the hall to escort her out.
One of the nurses gives me a smile, as I walk back into the room, but I keep going to Noah's bed. I'm on his good side, well, not the burned side, and standing here, I can see him, Johnny, and Becky.
Noah still isn't talking, and his eyes are barely open. When I lean in, I can tell his eyes are trying to focus on me.
"I don't know if you will even remember this, but you dodged a bullet with her. I know it hurts right now, but it's better to know her true nature than to be trapped in a marriage with someone as selfish and shallow. There’s someone out there who will love you for you." I say.
He grunts but still doesn't say anything.
"Listen, we aren't all shallow and materialistic. Look at Becky. She fell in love with my brother, and it wasn't for his good looks."
I see Johnny flip me the bird, but Becky laughs.
"She’s right," Becky says. "The right woman, not a girl like your ex there, but a real woman falls in love with the person. Looks fade, but the man inside doesn't."
I smile at him, "The right girl won't care about the scars, and she’ll only care about you."
Being this close to him for the first time is intoxicating. It’s like he’s pulling me in. Though, he still hasn't said anything, his eyes are fixed on me. So, I figure this is the perfect time to tell him my favorite quote on scars.
“From every wound, there’s a scar, and every scar tells a story. A story that says you survived. A scar simply means you were stronger than whatever tried to hurt you. Besides, scars are just tattoos with better stories, as they are God given tattoos.”
When I reach for his hand, I'm not expecting the sparks that shoot up my arm. I did not anticipate the electricity, flowing between us. I figure it's got to be the adrenaline from telling his ex off, right?
"You will fight, and you will be okay. You don't have a choice." I say sternly.
Then, speaking for the first time, he looks at me again, and his words are slow. It’s obvious that it takes a lot out of him just to talk. "What’s the point? I don't have… anyone to fight with me… like Moore does. He has you two. No one came for me."
He's referring to Johnny, my brother, whose last name is Moore. Though, he's Johnny to me, it's still hard hearing the guys he’s stationed with calling him Moore.
"I came for you," I reply to Noah.
Johnny gives me a nod, telling me it's okay, and that I made the right choice.
"Besides," I continue. "You will save me from being the third wheel over there."
Just then, a nurse comes around and gives him some more pain medicine. Since I know it will knock him out fast, I bend close to his ear.
"I'm not going anywhere. Fight for me and choose to live. I will be here, when you wake up." I say.
He doesn't respond, but is back asleep from the medicine, so I walk back over to my brother's bed.
"That's Noah, and I remember you talking about him, but what's his story?" I ask.
"Noah Carr. His parents are in Colorado, but they don't have the money to come out here, take time off, or even get passports. He sends money home to them every paycheck to help them and his two younger sisters out. Once he's stateside, I don't think they’ll even be able to make it to visit." Johnny says.
I nod and turn to Becky, "We should take up a collection from The Unit back home, and see if we can raise the money to help get them out to visit, once he's stateside."
Becky nods, "I’ll get working on it with the other wives."
I walk back over and sit down next to Noah and take my first good look at him. Though, I see very little of it, I can tell he has thick, curly, brown hair. Most of his head and face are bandaged, but I remember his piercing blue eyes.
Looking down at the bed, I see his right arm is bandaged, and I'm assuming his leg is as well.
Before long, how tired I am catches up with me. It's now some time Tuesday, and I haven't slept, since we got the call about Johnny. I fold my arms on the side of Noah's bed and rest my head on them. I just need to close my eyes for a few minutes.
